Am I Abandoned?

One sweet middle school girl (who will remain nameless) asked...

“God is not listening to me; am I abandoned?”

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Princess, I can absolutely GUARANTEE that God has not abandoned you. Words are cheap when you feel such strong emotions though, so let’s dig deeper into this. 

First of all, I would ask a follow-up question:

What makes you think God isn’t listening to you?

Is it because you feel a certain way (lonely, sad, scared, etc.), or are you not getting a specific answer to prayer? 

If you feel abandoned because of your emotions, I understand; they can be overwhelming sometimes. However, the truth is that emotions are not permanent and are rarely an accurate measure of reality. In other words, they are wonderful tools that God gave us to tell us something is going on (informers) but are never meant to define what is going on (dictators).

 

For example, I can feel completely happy, sad, depressed, angry, abandoned, and fulfilled, ALL IN THE SAME DAY—without anything changing around me. Sometimes the cause is hormonal (especially for us women), sometimes circumstantial, and occasionally just how we physically feel. Believe it or not, things like sleep, diet, exercise, etc., play a major role in how we feel.

 

If you find this is what’s going on, the answer is to hold tight to God’s Truth and give your feelings to Him. Our emotions are a gift from God, but because we’re human, they can’t always be trusted. Surrendering your emotions to God doesn’t mean they’ll automatically be perfect, and you’ll feel better, but it does remind you Who is in control and that He can’t lie! God’s promises and love for you will NEVER change— so you can always rest assured that when all else fails, He never will.

Now, the more complicated possibility: maybe you’re feeling abandoned because God has not answered your prayer (or at least not in the way you wanted Him to).

 

Some examples of this would be if a loved one died even though you prayed for them to be healed, you didn’t make the team, a friend has ghosted you, and countless other heartaches.  

 

While the answer to this is not always easy to stomach, it is very straightforward:

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—God ALWAYS answers prayers from His children—

(we just may not always like the answer)

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That means that if you have truly given your life to Christ, then He WILL answer you; it just might not be in the way you think He should. I once heard that God answers prayer in 4 ways: Yes, No, Yes—and MORE, and Wait.

The problem comes when we think  God should answer us in a specific way, and He doesn’t. God sees the big picture with everything, though, not the tiny keyhole amount that we can see. He knows exactly what we need and want, but He’s our perfect Father and knows that what is best in the big picture might not be what we ask for.

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Here are some difficult examples and some possible reasons why God may say no:

1. A loved one passes away.

This stings so much when we pray for them to be healed or protected, and then the worst happens. We don’t always know why God takes some of His children home when He does, but He sees infinitely further down the road than we ever could. [Have you ever watched a drop of water ripple into a huge circle? When something happens we may see it as a bad thing that has disturbed our peace. However, we can’t see the ripple effect that will occur later on and the good that may come of it.] Some possible reasons for death could be to save them from more suffering, to turn someone else’s hard heart toward Christ, to save someone through their story that may have never heard the Gospel otherwise, and countless other possibilities. 

2. You didn’t get something you wanted (or someone didn't treat you the way you think they should). 

Have you ever wanted something REEEAAALLLYYY badly, not gotten it, and realized later that it would have been a terrible mistake or a bad situation? There’s no way we can see into our future, and God is not trying to make us miserable—He just knows what we actually need, not what we think we want.

 

God will always do two things when we belong to Him and surrender to His will:

1- He’ll do whatever brings Him the most glory

2- He’ll do whatever is best for us

 

Regardless of age, feeling abandoned hurts, but I do hope you feel a little encouraged in knowing that God will always answer you—He loves you so much. Stay faithful, keep pursuing Him, and trust that He said He’d NEVER abandon you, and He really does want what’s best for you. I PROMISE!

 

For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. (Romans 8:38-39)